If you wish to keep your children happy, make sure they don’t have absolutely everything they want. This idea is in contradiction with the famous mentality that preaches that we should have “everything, right now,” in a world where many people in developed countries have everything they need.
People often make the mistake of believing that the best way to make children happy is to bend to all their desires and satisfy their every whim, ensuring they never get bored.
According to Valerie Halfon, a budget management consultant, “if we want to re-enchant childhood, we should stop spoiling children,” let’s say Avoid giving too soon
The current means is to consider children as mini-adults. And Marketers call this phenomenon “kids getting older younger” (KGOY). This is promoted mostly by fashion, entertainment, and electronics industries, but also by an educational system that leaves no time for play, discovery, or boredom.
And Maria Montessori said, “Let our children grow at their own pace! Let’s stop to overstimulate them. Because over stimulating them is useless! It really exhausts them, and it exhausts the parents too!
Avoid giving too many things at a time
Mountains of gifts at Christmas, a host of diverse and varied activities during the holidays, abundant sweets and snacks that put to shame the dessert carts of great restaurants. In the will of every parent to please their children, but they sometimes achieve the opposite effect: the children turn out to become tired of everything, bored by instant gratification, and eventually disillusioned.
On the other hand, “experiencing need develops in them is an essential quality” says Valérie Halfon. Parents don’t always notice how much getting their kids used to things may make them jaded.
It’s by overcoming small frustrations and small difficulties that kids learn to excel and grow. The truth is that Children who don’t expect to be offered the moon on a platter are happy with everything they receive. And when they have gotten used to feeling gratitude and empathy, they’re really much happier.
Avoid serving everything on a silver platter
Excess of consumption, overabundance, and overflowing options is likable to make a child passive. But when you allow them to make their decisions they tend to become autonomous, creative and happy. Parents must avoid spoiling their children too much, because if you give everything to a child, and if he finds everything at hand, why would he want to make an effort?”
Parents teaching their children to live and play within certain limitations will prepare them more realistically for adulthood, it will make them more grateful for what they have, and help them to explore their toys and the world around them more actively, getting more fun and wonder out of them. It will also create a way for them to discover the joy of anticipation.
As a matter of fact, as paradoxical as it may seem in a consumerist and materialistic society, having it all and having it here and now won’t make us as happy as knowing what it is to experience want and how to savor the good things we have.
